So Long ...

It's the end of summer as we know it. Do you fine feel?

Was your summer SO LONG; or are you bidding summer so long with a sorrowful heart?

I have mixed emotions, like always, but I guess that's typical for a person with schizophrenia/dementia/boanthropy. (What? You don't know what that is? It's a disorder when someone believes they are a BOVINE. I'm not even kidding! Read about that and other bizarre psychological disorders here, but warning: there is a gross picture of a man "nibbling" on his own arm. Why? Because that's another disorder. And speaking of other disorders, I'm pretty sure I have a few from that page, but I'm not telling you which ones ... in addition to the alien-hand syndrome, which I OBVIOUSLY have!) but anyway (my heck I like tangents, don't I?) --what were we talking about? Right--I have mixed emotions about summer ending.

I am SO ready for the kids to have a schedule and get their brains stimulated again. I am so NOT ready for the good weather to end. I am also so NOT ready to have the kids dressed and out the door by 8 a.m. Yikes. Why is that the world's hardest task?

I am also sad that there is so much we didn't get to do this summer. I feel like I need to write an apology letter to summer. So, therefore, I will.

Dear Summer, 

I am sorry I didn't go to Glacier Park. No, not even once.

I am sorry I didn't hike to a waterfall.

I am sorry I didn't kill any tree squirrels. Three would have been a good start.

I am sorry I only ate corn-on-the-cob once, but that's what happens when you get dentures.

I am sorry I didn't get to see hardly any family, and even fewer long-distance friends. (Oh, but the friends and family I did get to see made my heart warmer than a July day in Phoenix!)

I am sorry that I didn't get a single household project done, nor did I write a single word of fiction. 

I am sorry that we didn't get to do the Hiawatha Bike Trail. 

I am sorry that we didn't pick enough huckleberries to make freezer jam. 

But Summer, 

Thank you for all the perfect days at the lake. (Made it to 7 different lakes this summer, plus 3 different spots on Flathead!) 

Thank you for the day on the boat. That was THE BEST.

(I can't get the video to upload right, so we'll just pretend like it's a GIF.)
 

Thank you for all the fresh cherries. My intestines were appreciative. 

Thank you for awesome day hikes and bike rides. 

Thank you for smiling, happy kids.

Thank you for our stop in Butte. I fell in love. (Really. I must go back!) 

But mostly, thank you for the sunshine. 

Sincerely, 
Emotional me. 

Your turn:

What are you sorry you missed this summer? What things are you thankful for? How do you feel about having it come to an end?

Annnndddd .... I know it's the last week of the month (like, duh) and I should have a prize this week. BUT! the little kids start school Wednesday, the teens start on Thursday and I'm worried I won't have a spare second to post a winner, let alone shop for said winning prize. So, if it's alright with all of y'all, I will do a doubly awesome prize in Sept. PLUS, I will include these weeks in the lottery, so you will have 6 chances to win in September. Okie dokie???

I'd Rather Go To Sleep

Well hi. How are youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

Oops, sorry. I just fell asleep at the keyboard. Why am I tired? Well because we just drove over 800 miles in one day. Sounds like fun, huh? Actually, it was fun because I love seeing Montana and I also love dropping two teens off at EFY. They are going to have the time of their lives--and that makes a momma happy. Oh, and I don't have to cook as much this week, so that makes me happy too. And I won't have to break up so many fights this week, so that makes me happy too. And I won't have to .... never mind. You get the drift. It's a win-win for everyone.

Since I need a seriously long snooze, let's keep this week simple. Want to play Would You Rather? I have some rathers for you: some copied, some altered, and some original. Here we go:

1. Would you rather come face to face with a bear, or would you rather have to bare it all while answering the door for one entire day?

2. Would you rather have to drive over rumble-strips non-stop for 5 hours or follow a livestock trailer full of cows for 5 hours?

3. Would you rather have a toot escape and be so loud it could be heard across an entire college campus or wear feminine hygiene product on your back to the grocery store?

4. Would you rather have your diary published or see your most embarrassing moment remade into a big-budget movie?

5. Would you rather drive a super car that looks amazing, but can only go 25 miles per hour or get a speeding ticket in front of your child's school: right as school is being dismissed?

6. Would you rather listen to Call Me, Maybe every hour, on the hour, for one entire year or listen to Jim Carrey do the most annoying sound in the world for 24 hours non-stop?

7. Would you rather not be able to shower except for once a week, or not be able to brush your teeth except for once a week?

8. Would you rather go on a cruise with Matchbox 20 and Goo Goo Dolls on a cruise to the Bahamas (yes, really!) or go on a cruise with Justin Bieber and One Direction. (No, not really. Sorry to get your hopes up.)

9. Would you rather change Grumpy Cat's litter box every day for a year or give Brad Pitt a pedicure after he has spent a month in Africa wearing the same socks and hiking boots every single day?

10. Would you rather leave a comment on a blog or silently stalk?

OK--answer as many or as few as you like! And then leave one or two or three or four or five for me to answer too! Steal em, make em up, whatever ... just give me some so I can play back, OK? And you can answer ones from the comment thread too. WHATEVER.Let's just have fun--or as I said in my 4th grade original story "Gust have fun!" (I was good at typos even way back then, before I learned to type!)

I'm gonna go get me some snoozes now. Thanks for playing!

I'm Picturing A Winner

I remembered to 1. Buy a gift and 2. Post a prize winner. This is a good week for me guys! I might not have Alzheimer's after all! This is a win for all of us ... but mostly it's a win for one lucky commenter! And that commenter is ...

Oh wait, I can't tell you who it is yet. I need to practice my "suspensial" writing skills and make you wait

wait ...

wait ...

wait ...

wait ...

And then wait some more ...

And then stop annoying you and at least tell you what week was the winning week.

It was the post prior to this week's post, which is the post where I shamelessly solicited birthday wishes.

(I know this is incredibly riveting.)

And the gift I selected was meant to tie in with my celebration of oldness. (Are you getting tired of me whining about my age? Because I'm getting tired of it. But, I've been told by the government that there is absolutely no legal way for me to alter my birth certificate to reflect a more suitable age. I am pursuing other options that may be hitherto forthcoming at another time.) Anywhichway, since we don't want to forget all the memories created in days gone by, we must take pictures and we must place them on our mantle pieces and in photoalbums to be displayed on our coffee tables. So there's this:

 (a frame)

And this:

 (photo album)

And then there's this:











Oh wait, that's all I got. I spent the rest of my money on hair dye to color my grays.

SO now I can tell you the winner. And, from the second post of July, without any further ado, I will tell you that it's #  ...

# ....

 # ...

(this is just like reality TV, except I'm not going to go to commercial break.)

# 11 .... Devree!!!!

Wahoo Devree! It's been many lightyears since you won! I'm not sure which location you are at ... college or home or the Caribbean, so email me, will ya?