We have a blog post! A GUEST blog post! I'm so excited, especially since I've been begging her to do a post since the blog started back in 1893. And especially since we all want to know more about what makes Paulashawn Paulashawn. Paula is often called FOXY, and not just because she is one hot momma, but because she is sly, tricky and ... dare I say it? Cunning! (But in a good way ... you'll see.) Take it away Paula!
The day after April Fool's. My day of guilt. Actually, I have many
days of guilt each year - all over the sinister activities I create and
carry out at the expense of others. For some reason, my 'natural' woman
temptations bring me sheer delight when I conceive of them and make them
happen. Sadly, some of them bring remorse.
Like the two I just pulled on my friend and co-teacher in
Primary. It was her turn to teach last week and it was also our
ward conference. An hour before our 9:00 church I texted her, "the
Primary pres. got a hold of you right? She wants you to teach a
different lesson today." Of course she didn't look at her text until she
was out the door. We both pulled up at the church at the same time and
she got out of her car practically yelling, "I can't believe I just got the message about
our lesson! What am I supposed to do about it now? I'm going to look like an idiot!" I said, "April
Fool's is a week away!" and she blurted out, "You jerk!" Hours later she
asked me to define "terrorist" for her boys.
So yesterday I woke up remembering the great prank I pulled on E
the week before and wished I would have saved it for the day before
April Fool's. And then inspiration struck. I quickly got my phone out
and texted her, (from out of state on vacation) "I totally forgot that I
said I would play the piano in Primary today - can you 1 finger it for
me? My schedule has been so crazy that I forgot." (she slightly
plays the piano.) She texted back, "Sure! No prob. Have a peaceful
vacation and a nice Easter." I wrote back, 'Happy Day before April
Fool's!" I didn't hear back from her, so I called her a bit later. I
said, "Are you practicing the piano right now?" She wasn't and was
hardly ready to go and needed to leave in 15 minutes. She said, "I don't
even know what songs they are singing today." I asked her if she had
seen my last text about it being April Fool's Eve. Again I was called a
jerk. She said,
"I didn't think you'd do something like that after last week." I
couldn't believe that she'd believe me again after last week.
But that one made me feel a little more guilty than I like. She was
so nice to take a burden from me and wish me happiness. I was so rude!
What pranks have you pulled off? How do you feel after doing them? Where do you get your ideas?
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My husband says I have a dark gift. I do delight in pranking
others, that's for sure. I wish you had more time and I'd recall some
more of them with you. Here's a picture of my guilt free and flowing
laughter prank from today. These are the good ones. But the ones that
mess with your mind are the really fun ones. I'm sorry I have such a
dark side. Have I ever pranked you?
Please share your ideas and your fun. But do remember - this is a
family-friendly blog. All readers should feel safe reading/viewing all
things here -- right Lori?!
You really think I'm going to let you get the last word Paula? Are you implying that I post inappropriateness? I would call you a jerk, but it sounds like your friend already has. (Teehee. That was mean. Sorry.) And BTW, toilet paper is supposed to go over, not under.
18 comments:
I loved April Fool's in college! Steve hasn't gotten the joy of me pranking him. I should do that.
I use to rubber band the hose sprayer that was in our apartment kitchen at school. Those were one that were separate from the faucet itself, so as soon as you turned on the faucet, you got sprayed. I would dye milk, put bread crumbs in beds, etc. But my very favorite one, I pulled on my very favorite roommate. In fact, she texted me yesterday telling me she had thought of me that morning. She wore pajama shorts to bed every night and I had sewn one of the legs shut. It worked out perfectly. She put her leg through the open hole and as she went to put her leg through the other one, her shorts just kept getting yanked down. She tried several times and by that point I was dying of laughter so she threw them at me and made me fix them.
I used that same prank later in a prank war with one of my friends from school. He was still finding clothes I had sewn shut 6 months later so he conceded that I'd won the war. :) In that one, I had also shaving creamed his windows and oreo'd his car. He had saran wrapped my truck and strung my bedroom up with string like spiderman.
I'm boring and I am really not much of a prankster. I never really liked April Fools day as a kid and it hasn't changed very much for me.
My husband likes to dump cold water on me while I am in the shower, or reach his hand through the shower curtain just to scare me and even though he has done it numerous times it still gets me EVERY time. I'm a bit of a chicken.
I don't think I have ever been pranked by you... but I do remember you putting diapers on my 10+ year old brother when you were babysitting us once :)
Nicole: I would have never expected prankyness from you! Your nickname should be Ilene. Get it? I've never heard of sewing clothes together--hilarious! I would like to sew the top of someone's pants to the top of someone's shirt so that when they have to go to the potty ... you get it. Any thoughts on how to get away with that?
Anne: BTW, I forgot to email you last week. I'll do that now. Or in a minute. I remember that diaper episode. It didn't go over well, did it? I'm a chicken too and fall for the same trick time after time. Good thing we don't have to share a dorm with Nicole. :)
Paula: The only prank I can remember doing is the one where we called mom on April Fool's and told her we crashed both cars in one day. I wouldn't joke about something like that now, because with our luck, it could really happen. That was the same April Fool's that you trumped me by telling mom you were moving to the Philippines. Have you ever pranked me? Hmm, let me think ... I seem to remember losing my pants a few times in my tween/teen years. Did you have anything to do with that? My memory is so foggy. And then there was the time you hid in the back of my car on a dark night and waited until I started driving before you creeped up so I could see you in my rear view mirror. I was scared out of my pants (yet again.) I hope you are able to pull this prank on B when he gets his license and is out on a date. You would earn mom of the year for that one.
So some of you that have driven very far with Lori may know that she sleeps most of the time while riding as passenger in a car. However, the term is very subjective because she sleeps very lightly.
Expansion joints, potholes, and especially rumble strips startle her quickly back awake. She'll wake up and very worriedly ask if I'm awake or if everything is okay.
One trip I was trying to let her get as much sleep as possible in hopes that eventually she'd be able to trade off and give me a turn to sleep. She kept waking up with every bump and noise that she heard. So I decided to get even with her and intentionally drifted to the shoulder of the road and ran over the rumble strips. On cue she woke up panicked that I had fallen asleep. This time, however, I had rested my head back against the head rest and closed my eyes just long enough for her to wake to witness her worst fear.
I was punched back awake and started laughing and then I think I was punched every 5 minutes for the rest of the trip for the mental anguish that I had inflicted.
She still sleeps that same way on trips, but I don't joke around like that any more.
Matt
The only prank I think of involves my sister. Our voices are very similar and I used to answer the phone and pretend I was her when her boyfriend called. I didn't get him to say anything too juicy though..shucks!
I'm usually not a very convincing liar, pretending or not, so I don't attempt pranks very often. This week though I used a friend's funny suggestion, and made a plate of "brown Es" for my family. Not brownies, but a plate full of copies of the letter E cut out of brown paper. We laughed about it together.
The best lie my husband ever believed from me was when I came home from somewhere and told him I had received a traffic ticket (which is never funny, of course, but when you're destitute starving students, it's awful). I kept him going for a good 5 minutes before I told the truth :).
My family has a long-standing inside joke about giving gifts to each other--for birthdays or Christmas--where you steal something from the birthday person's room (like a CD from their collection) and wrap it up to give them. They open it and look confused as to how they should react, and we love it if they forget the joke and genuinely pretend that they love the gift, even though they already own that CD. Last Christmas we sneaked into my mom's suitcase and wrapped up her brand new package of pantyhose to give her, and she was so excited "this is just the kind that I like!" We all roared in laughter, and it took her only 1 moment to realize she'd been had, and join in the laughter.
Our favorite reappearing gift though is a little figure of a man made of twisted baling wire that's been in our family for decades (made by my brother when he was a teen), and he gets gifted to each of us at the most surprising times, like at my brother's wedding reception. We call him "Art Wireman," and we celebrate Art's birthday every year, on April Fool's Day.
Matt: after years of therapy, I still can't see the humor in that situation. Not at all. It took 5 years off my life. And the only reason you remember the punching is because I'm buffer than you. :) JK
Livingstonslifeinmt: ... And that's why cell phones were invented.
JazznJenna: Can I get the recipe for your brown-E's? Love what you did to your mom. Remind me to lock my suitcase if I ever come for a visit.
I usually don't do pranks because 1: I'm not creative enough and 2: I'm too innocent! ( :D ) I'm the girl that threatens that something bad will happen to my bros but then I don't follow through because they aren't causing malice while they're sleeping and I forget how mad I was when whatever made me mad happened.
I remember when I was younger I was a jerk and made my youngest bro cry. On April Fools day I woke him up really early and told him we were going to Grandma's. My mom wasn't too good to him at the end of the day either; She told him we had pet tortoises but they turned out just to be footstools that looked like tortoises which made him cry again. Poor kid.
Devree: your poor brother. Maybe you can get him turtles for his birthday this year to make it up to him? Should you ever decide that Paula needs a good pranking, I'll tell you this useful piece of information: she's deathly afraid of mice. You want to hear her scream like a sissy girl, don't you? Run with it!
My very first impression of Paula was of her pranky side... Imagine opening a lovely wedding gift and being excited it was the picture frames you registered for, then realizing all ten frames are filled with pictures of Paula and Shawn! We got a good laugh.
...A year and a half later they are still in the frames and being displayed on our living room wall! :)
KuteKaeleen: Hi! You have a Paulashawn shrine in your living room? hahahahaha. So funny. What a great conversation piece! I wish had Paula's same brain and I could have got you towels monogrammed with my initials!
Kaeleen, there is definitely something grand about you that I really like! Thanks for the reminder that I should send you updated pictures periodically.
I'm wondering - what's the mood in that room? Is it anxious, light-hearted, calming, or hideous? Or maybe I don't want to know ;-)
You are a good sport. You need to talk to my friend!
Kaeleen, you should have your husband tell you what he gave us for our wedding gift. I really wanted to find a way to gift it back to you two but I couldn't find it after we moved! I know we had it the first time we moved.
Nicole: now I'm dying to know: what did Kyle give you guys? Matching Jeep belt buckles?
He gave us a bedpan. It had cash in it, so that was awesome, but it was a pretty old bedpan. (It had been cleaned though, so that was considerate!)
Nicole: 1. Was it an inside joke between the groom and the giftee? 2. Did you use rubber gloves when you retrieved the money? And did you tell the bank to put the money out of circulation? I could have ended up with that money and got ecoli! 3. How could you lose such a valuable possession? I bet Kyle is offended. He'll never get you another gift.
I know, he'll probably never speak to us agin :( It wasn't an inside joke that I know of, I can't remember if he had given us a note with it or not... I remember one of the gifts took us a while to figure out who it was from, and it may have been that one. I think he got it from a DI?
Oh my gosh Nicole i am very sorry i was not in Kyles life sooner to save you from that gift... you are not the only ones he gave crazy gifts to. and for that i was very surprised (and grateful) we only got pictures of Paula and Shawn :) I have since taken over the gift giving in our marriage! i will try and make up for it with a baby gift.
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