Giving Warm Fuzzies to a Winner

It's been so long since I've posted a winner that I almost forgot how to do it. I almost made each of you buy me a prize instead! Hardy har har. But! That's a great idea, isn't it? We should do that sometime. Any person who leaves a comment will be forced to buy me something! How many comments do you think I will get? (I'm thinking it will be somewhere in the 500 range.)

OK, I did it different this time. All the weeks of August and September were eligible for the prize, so I just added up all the comments for a grand total of 53 (oh wait, I think I'm way off on my 500 guesstimate in the above aforementioned paragraph.) comments. I then typed in Random.org on my computadora to go to the website of Random.org, and low and behold, this webby page thingy popped up with a random number generator. I entered 1 thru 53. It then gave me the random number of 29. I then scrolled through each and every comment until I got to comment number 29 (this was difficult since I only know how to count to 16 and that's just in Spanish!) and I found that the winner is from last week's post on California and Dreamin. And the winner is comment #2 from that week ... it's Paulashawn!

Paula, how long has it been since you were a true winner? I'm so glad you finally came around! And I know you are probably going to try and be benevolent and pass on the prize, but these are things you all love, so you can't refuse!

# uno   Hottie Cocoa

(it's levitating!)

#dos   The fluffiest slippers you ever did feel!

#tres   The snuggliest blanket you ever did snuggle with!

See, you want all these things, don't you? (Say yes!)

(My photography skills are borderline professional today!) 

Can you tell that I am greatly concerned about the cold that is descending upon us? I will feel much better if I know you will be able to stay warm this winter, so let me share my warmth with you! I shall mail them to you posthaste. (Or probably laterhaste.)

See y'all back next week!

Dream Sketcher

I know what you are thinking. You saw "dream" in the title and you groaned a little inside, didn't you? You were thinking, "Great, Lori is going to be talking about beaches again. And almonds. That's all she ever talks about." But NO! You are wrong, wrong, wrong. This is something entirely different. We are going to talk about my other favorite subject: SLEEP.

Do dreams fascinate you? (My goodness, you do dream, don't you? I don't want to offend anyone who doesn't dream, or has insomnia, or a new baby.) I find it amazing that the mind can be so active when the rest of your body is comatose. It gives me great reassurance that I'm not brain dead after all! My dreams vary from strange to mundane to scary (although that doesn't happen all that often) to creative to inspirational. I typically remember my dreams and have decided that I should sleep extra long (like 14-16 hours a day) so I have more dreams to think about when I'm awake.

I didn't have a lot of nightmares as a child, but when I did, the dream was always the same: A band of robbers would come out of the closet and be lurking in Paula's room and I would see them there and become frozen with fear and not be able to move, let alone scream. I now know that this means that I was actually afraid of Paula and she was stifling me and not allowing me to express myself. (JK Paulawog.)

Picture from here.

Occasionally, I will have a nightmare and it always involves something bad happening to one of my children. Those are THE WORST. Interpretation: I love and care about my children's' well-being, even if I am the kind of mom who is glad when they head off to school each morning.

Of course you know that Twilight began as a dream, and this happens a lot to other authors. Did I ever tell you guys that The Reign of Trees was born from a dream as well? I know it sounds cliche, but that's a super amazing experience. Many great book ideas have been hatched this way, but sadly sometimes I forget what they were before I have a chance to get up and write them all down. It's also possible that the ideas really aren't that great but in my sleep-induced delusion, I think something is profound and it's really about as worthless as clothes in Miley Cyrus' dressing room.

One thing that always baffles me is when you dream of a person from your past that you haven't seen in over a decade (or longer) and that you don't even recall thinking about in practically just as long. These dreams mean that you are a bad friend and you should really keep in better touch with people.

Weird dreams are my personal favorite. I love it when you wake up and you're like "WHAT THE ???" Just last week I had one of these which involved a large group of children letting off hundreds of yellow helium balloons (wait for it) and on top of each balloon was a red Clifford stuffed animal, all of different makes and sizes, hand-selected by the child to release into the atmosphere. Now let's remember I don't have little children anymore, so I haven't seen a Clifford movie, book, or stuffed animal in a couple of years. What the heck did that mean? ... Rising balloons mean a desire to escape from life (hello last week's post about living on the beach!) and embrace my inner child.  Yellow represents brightness and sunshine (hello last week's post about living on the beach!) and Clifford the dog means that I am larger than life (hello ... um nothing I've ever said anytime, anywhere). So all of those elements put together means I shouldn't drink so much Dirty Diet Coke. (You have had one, haven't you?)

(Google search Clifford + Balloons)

I frequently have "teeth" dreams, although they seem to be decreasing as I get old (oh no, not THAT again).  Basically, it's like when Sylvester the Cat gets hit in the mouth and his teeth are like piano keys, and they play the scale as they fall from his mouth. In my dreams, this happens while I'm trying to talk to someone and every time I say another word, out flies another tooth. This means that I'm vain and that I'm insecure. It is a good thing I don't have those dreams so much anymore because those are traits I don't really love. I also suspect I don't have those dreams so often now days because my horrid habit of chewing ice is going to make those dreams a reality and who wants to dream about something that will inevitably happen?  (Kinda can't wait for dentures though. Who wouldn't want white, straight teeth that aren't sensitive to heat?)

The other weird dream I have involves gum. I'm chewing a big wad of gum and I try to spit it out, but it just keeps growing and growing. I try to pull the gum out for what feels like forever, but I can never get it all out of my mouth, so I can't talk and all I do is mumble to people, sounding like I just swallowed an entire can of marshmallow creme. This means that I feel like I have problems expressing myself (says the writer with a bad case of writers block) or oftentimes am not able to say what is on my mind (says the coward who backs away from any confrontation). It also could mean that I feel like I have bitten off more than I can chew (yes Primary, I'm looking at you).

What frequent dreams do you have? Anything scary? Or just plain weird?

Do you remember a particular dream that was just amazing? Do you ever want to fall back asleep so that you can stay in that certain Dreamland?

And since I am now certified with a BC in Dreamology from the University of Anywhere (Online), I will interpret your dreams for you! So tell me all about them, and I will tell you what is really wrong with your life. (I promise to be gentle)

Picture from this site right here.

Ready? Let's get lost in the world of Inception!

Plus: it's the end of the month, so I will have a prize for one super lucky person! Make sure you come back Thursday to see who has Lady Luck on their side!

California and Dreamin'

We're baaaaaack! Thanks for letting me skip out on the blog last week friends! It was fabulous to get away for a few days, even if all that driving gave me some majorly plush canckles!

California, I like you. You are pretty (ish. Some places, not so much. Yes Barstow, I'm talking about you.). You have an ocean! (Shocking, I know!) You have so much industry. So much agriculture! Did you know all my favorite foods are grown in California? I have decided to move there when I retire and buy an almond farm. It makes perfect sense really, because I spend a few hundred dollars on almonds every month year, so I may as well save a few bucks and grow my own!

But guess what: even more than retiring to an almond farm, I could see myself living in California (oceanside), especially during the months of January, February, March, April and May (and sometimes June.) (Shh, don't tell my dad!) California has lots to offer and I can see why the southerners from way down south risk life and limb to get there. (Honestly, I can't really see that, but I haven't been to Mehico to see the deplorable conditions, so I shall reserve my judgement.)

I'm lucky enough to live in a major tourist destination. (Sometimes me thinks I'm not lucky-- sometimes me thinks I'm cursed! Tourists don't know how to drive. Nor do they know you can't launch fireworks all summer long. But I digress ... ) I know droves of people who visit here, fall in love and then want to move here. It's funny too how people think it would be blissful to live in an area so lovely, but they fail to realize that when you live here, you don't get to play all the time. You still have to work, get kids to school and extra curricular, clean the house, etc, clean the house, etc, clean the house, etc .... If you are not careful, you can get so caught up in the daily grind that you forget you live somewhere awesome.

One of my favorite sights in California was down by the pier at about 9:30 a.m. We saw a guy getting dressed after surfing. ....Wait, I worded that wrong. We didn't watch him get dressed and seeing things like that isn't my favorite thing. (Promise. If you could have seen me regurgitate my morning Coke when I saw a lady's cheek hanging out of her shorts this morning as I dropped the kids off from school, you would believe me! (Yes, I really saw that. Ick. And she went INTO the school like that. Double ick. I bet her children look forward to winter.))  Anywho, back to the story: this fellow had just changed into his button-down shirt and slacks and was getting ready for work after spending the morning surfing. How cool is that?

I think everyone falls in love with various tourist destinations, but only a small handful of people can move to those dream locales without worrying about how to pay for their new adventure. (And even if you could afford to move to a beach somewhere, you wouldn't want to do NOTHING all the time, would you? BORING!)

What tourist spot have you visited and then fallen in love with? Have you dreamt of moving there? And what would you do to pay the bills? Be creative: you can do anything you want to do while living in dreamland!

I'm going to cheat a little on mine (my dream, I can do what I want!). I've never been to the Caribbean, mostly because I know if I went there, I would never come back! (There might be another reason that has something to do with finances, but we'll forget about that part. DEPRESSING!) But, I know I would love to live there because I've seen it in on the Telly and it looks heavenly! So, I'm going to move somewhere tropical and live on the ocean, and for a job I'm going to work in a bakery or as a barista in a non-alcoholic bar mixing Dirty Diet Cokes. I think it would be fun to have a job where you could meet people from all over the world and tell them about all the hidden treasures of that area. Is that weird? I think it sounds very low-stress and very high-adventure!

Your turn: Pick a dream destination to relocate to and then find a way to make it happen! For reals! Get planning! I want you moving half-way around the world by December! (Just kidding. Not for reals. Just for dreams. Unless you want to make it happen ... then don't let anything stop you!) (BTW, did you know that I've discovered that the key to motivating people is by using lots of exclamation marks? Seriously, it works!!!!)

Life's a Beach

You guys! Guess what? (Just guessssss!)

I am here ...

No, that is not a picture of MONTANA, nor is it anywhere near MONTANA, but is in fact CALIFORN.EYE. AYE. 

Yes, I am on a mini-vactation with the HUBS, who is on a workcation. But we are gone nonetheless and enjoying the cold, foggy beach. (I skipped down the beach guys. You could say I was excited.)

I will be back home soon (too soon!) but until then ... no blog post this week. I beg your pardon. I hope you can forgive me and can find something else to do this week. (Bummer for you.) I'll have a post next week, with more pictures (maybe ... so long as the fog is gone come morning) and some mind-blowing topic (which has yet to be determined) to be discussed. Later gaters!

Higher Learning

With the teenagers heading back to school (the eldest is a senior!) and my recent (like yesterday) trip to my hometown, I seem to have one thing on my brain: HIGH SCHOOL.

With the mention of that phrase, you might experience a couple of different emotions. Either you think

1. Eew, gross
or 
2. Oh, blessed day!
... or possibly
3. Meh.

And your feelings about that vertically aspiring institution likely change with time. I remember feeling like high school was the equivalent of living at the bottom of the Berkly Pit, but now that I look back, I think, "Oh my gosh, it was like living at Disneyland!" (OK, so I exaggerated, again. But really, it wasn't half-bad! I think I actually liked it ... most of the time.)

My high school was a big city high school, Montana style. We had just under 400 ish in our graduating class, so in comparison with the high school in my current town, that's huge. (Each class here has around 70.) But high school in Montana is high school in Montana. Meaning--it might be a little on the boring side. Sports are IT; all the other clubs and extracurricular seem to struggle. If you're a wide-receiver with Road Runner legs and glue-coated fingertips, Montana might be the place for you. But I was never very good at football.

But, just like real life, you can bloom anywhere. How does one bloom in the vast prairies of Montana (high schools)?

• Don't worry about what other people think about you. You can't change their thoughts. But you can change the way you think of yourself. That means you need to like yourself. Which is what gives you confidence. Which leads to the next point:

• Be confident. Everyone has insecurities. Just hide yours until you forget they exist.

• Don't try to fit into any particular group. Nobody likes to be classified by just one characteristic, (jock, geek, skater, whatever.) People are so much more than a label; don't strive to become one (popular).

• Have good hygiene. And don't ever, ever, ever have big bangs, even if everyone else has big bangs. 

• Be nice. Especially to the people who don't have good hygiene or have really big bangs. 

• Be silly. You have your entire life to be grown up. (Silly and immature aren't necessarily the same thing. Be wise in your silliness.)  

• Don't forget your family. They'll be around a lot longer than that one guy you squirted ketchup on (picture a white Miami Vice jacket) whose name you can't even remember. 

What advice would you give to current high schoolers? Anything you regret doing (or not doing) during high school? Did you love it or loathe it? Would you like to go back? (Who wants to watch Never Been Kissed? Looove that show.)

And just because I thought these were fun: we did a photo tour of Great Falls one day with our friend Stephanie. And by we, I mean Paula, because we were inseparable back then. Weren't we Paula? Also wanted to show these because there was absolutely nothing else to do that day, but look how much fun we had!

 

(You were getting kind cheeky with that guy, weren't you Paula?)

 

  
Let's talk high school! GO!

So Long ...

It's the end of summer as we know it. Do you fine feel?

Was your summer SO LONG; or are you bidding summer so long with a sorrowful heart?

I have mixed emotions, like always, but I guess that's typical for a person with schizophrenia/dementia/boanthropy. (What? You don't know what that is? It's a disorder when someone believes they are a BOVINE. I'm not even kidding! Read about that and other bizarre psychological disorders here, but warning: there is a gross picture of a man "nibbling" on his own arm. Why? Because that's another disorder. And speaking of other disorders, I'm pretty sure I have a few from that page, but I'm not telling you which ones ... in addition to the alien-hand syndrome, which I OBVIOUSLY have!) but anyway (my heck I like tangents, don't I?) --what were we talking about? Right--I have mixed emotions about summer ending.

I am SO ready for the kids to have a schedule and get their brains stimulated again. I am so NOT ready for the good weather to end. I am also so NOT ready to have the kids dressed and out the door by 8 a.m. Yikes. Why is that the world's hardest task?

I am also sad that there is so much we didn't get to do this summer. I feel like I need to write an apology letter to summer. So, therefore, I will.

Dear Summer, 

I am sorry I didn't go to Glacier Park. No, not even once.

I am sorry I didn't hike to a waterfall.

I am sorry I didn't kill any tree squirrels. Three would have been a good start.

I am sorry I only ate corn-on-the-cob once, but that's what happens when you get dentures.

I am sorry I didn't get to see hardly any family, and even fewer long-distance friends. (Oh, but the friends and family I did get to see made my heart warmer than a July day in Phoenix!)

I am sorry that I didn't get a single household project done, nor did I write a single word of fiction. 

I am sorry that we didn't get to do the Hiawatha Bike Trail. 

I am sorry that we didn't pick enough huckleberries to make freezer jam. 

But Summer, 

Thank you for all the perfect days at the lake. (Made it to 7 different lakes this summer, plus 3 different spots on Flathead!) 

Thank you for the day on the boat. That was THE BEST.

(I can't get the video to upload right, so we'll just pretend like it's a GIF.)
 

Thank you for all the fresh cherries. My intestines were appreciative. 

Thank you for awesome day hikes and bike rides. 

Thank you for smiling, happy kids.

Thank you for our stop in Butte. I fell in love. (Really. I must go back!) 

But mostly, thank you for the sunshine. 

Sincerely, 
Emotional me. 

Your turn:

What are you sorry you missed this summer? What things are you thankful for? How do you feel about having it come to an end?

Annnndddd .... I know it's the last week of the month (like, duh) and I should have a prize this week. BUT! the little kids start school Wednesday, the teens start on Thursday and I'm worried I won't have a spare second to post a winner, let alone shop for said winning prize. So, if it's alright with all of y'all, I will do a doubly awesome prize in Sept. PLUS, I will include these weeks in the lottery, so you will have 6 chances to win in September. Okie dokie???

I'd Rather Go To Sleep

Well hi. How are youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

Oops, sorry. I just fell asleep at the keyboard. Why am I tired? Well because we just drove over 800 miles in one day. Sounds like fun, huh? Actually, it was fun because I love seeing Montana and I also love dropping two teens off at EFY. They are going to have the time of their lives--and that makes a momma happy. Oh, and I don't have to cook as much this week, so that makes me happy too. And I won't have to break up so many fights this week, so that makes me happy too. And I won't have to .... never mind. You get the drift. It's a win-win for everyone.

Since I need a seriously long snooze, let's keep this week simple. Want to play Would You Rather? I have some rathers for you: some copied, some altered, and some original. Here we go:

1. Would you rather come face to face with a bear, or would you rather have to bare it all while answering the door for one entire day?

2. Would you rather have to drive over rumble-strips non-stop for 5 hours or follow a livestock trailer full of cows for 5 hours?

3. Would you rather have a toot escape and be so loud it could be heard across an entire college campus or wear feminine hygiene product on your back to the grocery store?

4. Would you rather have your diary published or see your most embarrassing moment remade into a big-budget movie?

5. Would you rather drive a super car that looks amazing, but can only go 25 miles per hour or get a speeding ticket in front of your child's school: right as school is being dismissed?

6. Would you rather listen to Call Me, Maybe every hour, on the hour, for one entire year or listen to Jim Carrey do the most annoying sound in the world for 24 hours non-stop?

7. Would you rather not be able to shower except for once a week, or not be able to brush your teeth except for once a week?

8. Would you rather go on a cruise with Matchbox 20 and Goo Goo Dolls on a cruise to the Bahamas (yes, really!) or go on a cruise with Justin Bieber and One Direction. (No, not really. Sorry to get your hopes up.)

9. Would you rather change Grumpy Cat's litter box every day for a year or give Brad Pitt a pedicure after he has spent a month in Africa wearing the same socks and hiking boots every single day?

10. Would you rather leave a comment on a blog or silently stalk?

OK--answer as many or as few as you like! And then leave one or two or three or four or five for me to answer too! Steal em, make em up, whatever ... just give me some so I can play back, OK? And you can answer ones from the comment thread too. WHATEVER.Let's just have fun--or as I said in my 4th grade original story "Gust have fun!" (I was good at typos even way back then, before I learned to type!)

I'm gonna go get me some snoozes now. Thanks for playing!