A Family Christmas

  Have you ever seen family Christmas photos that make you green with envy?      (We all like green during this season, but being green with envy isn't exactly what we are hoping for.) You know the kind of photo: the perfect family, all dressed matchy-matchy; everyone is beautiful AND photogenic; and the lighting and scenery are equally as riveting?

Well, this is NOT one of those Christmas photos:

We learned long ago not to waste money on professional photographs, especially when this is the best picture out of a batch of 30. I particularity like that when the photographer (aka Grandma) says, "OK, now do a goofy one," that the hubs gives us his very best face.
I also like how my fleece pockets (I love pockets!) make me look like I've got a kangaroo in my pouch. Don't want to start any rumors here: it just the pockets. They make me look all ... poofy. I might have to learn to think about style instead of comfort. (Nah!)

Here's wishing you a Merry Christmas, or as we say in Montana, 

Fleece Navidad.

The blog is on vacation until 2012: see you next year!

The Christmas Present (Winner)

Your Christmas stories made me feel warm and fuzzy. Thank you for giving me Christmas spirit--the best gift of all. (Especially because it's free!)

The prize this week is something warm and fuzzy. Something that will go with those Christmas pj's. Something that you could even wear to church. :)

Slippers! I have a nearly identical pair. Love them! We can be twinners!

This week's winner as selected by Random.org is: It's me! #7! I've always wanted to win! No? You don't think that's fair? OK. I'll re-click. #2 Edgertons! Yay for you! It's been a while since you won too. Congrats! I'll be in touch.

Good luck to everyone as you finish your Christmas preparations. May your tinsel not get tied in a knot. May your cookies not get dropped on the lawn. And may it actually SNOW! (Please snow, you could show up about now.)

I had planned on posting a family Christmas picture to wish y'all a very merry, but we haven't had the chance to take one yet. Pop back over to the blog next week, hopefully it will be done by then. Until then, have yourself a merry little Christmas! Love you guys!

Ghosts of Christmas Past

Well, the holidays are in full swing and I'm full on my way to looney. If you've been around me lately, you may have seen that my eyes are glazed over and I'm babbling incoherently. No, I haven't been downing eggnog, but rather, I'm suffering from self-induced holiday overload. I don't know why this happens year after year (well, OK, I do know why ... it's because I'm a procrastinator) but despite my best intentions, I'm always frazzled, stressed, and exhausted December 1st through 25th.

I've definitely cut out all unnecessary holiday fluff. Gone are the days when the presents under the tree are all done in coordinating paper. Nowadays, presents typically end up in a gift bag or a printed holiday box. Gone are the days of sending out Christmas cards. Sorry, but it's not like children change that much from year to year anyhow. :) And gone are the days of handmade gifts. Oh wait, those days never came around that much.

So this year, as I've tried to focus on what matters most, I've thought a lot about my childhood. The memories I have from my childhood Christmases are helping me to prioritize how I use my time so I can make sure my children don't grow-up into the Grinch who hates Christmas because Christmas turned their mom into Mrs. Grumpypants. Here are my favorite memories:

1. Singing Christmas carols (a capella) underneath the Christmas tree, using only the tree lights to see the words, with my sis PaulaShawn. (BTW, it's kinda weird that you took on your husband's first name. Most people hyphenate LAST names. Are you being the ultimate example of cohesiveness? Is that they key to connubial felicity?) We were probably 8 and 9 ish, and we didn't always get along back then (which is surprising because you can see that we never tease each other) so it was extra special to spend hours together signing off-key.

2. My mom would always bake cookies all day long on Christmas Eve. I don't think we ever ate anything other than cookies that entire day. Oh yum. (She's the best baker on Earth!) And then we would deliver them to all our friends and neighbors and drive around looking at all the lights. I LOVED doing that.

3. Staying up into the wee-hours waiting for Santa, also with PaulaShawn, when were trying to prove that Santa was not real. I think we must have been about 20 and 21 ish. We never did see him, but he did indeed come. How do I know? Because he left me a Cabbage Patch Kid and they were completely sold out in stores and this was back in the days before the internet, so there is no way my mom could have procured my beloved Clair Tansy.

4.  A few holiday mishaps: I remember when the large bulb lights burned a hole in our carpet. And I remember when the hamster I got died the day after Christmas. But! My brave mother waited in the return-line at K-Mart (this was back in the days before Wal-mart. Sheesh I'm old) with the remains of the dearly departed hamster in a brown bag. I remember how stiff the cashier was as she accepted the bag from my mom. Ha! That should teach them not to sell diseased pets to sweet little children. I think it was just a short time later that K-Mart stopped selling animals. Coincidence? I think not.

So to sum it up, Christmas for me was all about family, family, family. The best memories weren't planned; they were spontaneous. It didn't matter if did a daily advent activity, it didn't matter if we brought the fanciest treats to our school parties. What mattered is that we got to spend time together. Do you see how our Christmas pasts can help the mom's of Christmas present? ( Also the mom's buying Christmas presents?) Writing this down has helped me shift focus immensely.

Please give me the gift of sharing your memories. What are your favorite moments from your childhood Christmases? I know you guys are going to give me the tingles!

One Hot Winner

Thanks for the reminder bigskyboys. Yeah, I had the hots for them too. We played Dukes of Hazard all the time, but my BFF always got to be Daisy so I would get a brattitude and go off and pout like a fudder.

And speaking of Matt Damon bakerfam and Janice, have you seen previews for We Bought A Zoo? It made me get all goosebumply. Has he ever made a movie that was a bomb? I think he must be making a couple of bucks per movie.

Livingstonslifeinmt: You parted your hair on the same as his?! I'm sorry, I can't stop laughing. What happens if your hubby goes bald?

Caitlin: That is heartbreaking! I'm getting you some hummingbird earrings for Christmas. How about these ones?

Janice: I think you're the only one who might still be on speaking terms with your first crush. You da woman! Do you remember the song they played as you skated together?

Since this week was such a "hot" topic, I thought we might need something too cool off. Like Cold Stone! You can get something tall, dark and ... tasty.

The gal who gets to spend $10 at Cold Stone is # 4: Rosie! It's about time you won again! I'll get your card to you. Maybe you can use it next week on your big Sherlock Holmes night out.

See ya next week friends!

A Crushing Memory

So it's December! (I'm using an exclamation this time to indicate that I am now excited about this month rather than dreading it. Or at least I'm trying to pretend like I'm excited. Maybe I'll add a few more !!! to help force the enthusiasm.) It's December!!!!!! What does that mean on the blog? Well, that means it's going to be a short month. My kids are out of school on the 16th. Stop and think about that for a second. If you think, how lovely that Lori gets to spend an entire week with all five children twenty-four hours a day for eight days before the holiday, reconsider using the word lovely. The word mayhem might be more appropriate. So due to this early Christmas break, I will only be doing two posts this month: this week's and next week's. Then I will be staying away from the computer so we can have some "quality family time." Next week, the theme will obviously be something Christmassy.

That leaves this week to review the blog year of 2011:

We had lots of fun, didn't we? I met new friends, found old ones and I was supported in the launch of my two books by many amazing, clever, fun, and beautiful women. Thanks everyone!

I try not to look at statistics, but I couldn't help but noticing that one post this year far surpassed all other posts (over double the amount of page-views.) Do you know what post that was? It was the Wilder Times dream cast post. I think maybe, possibly, it has something to do with the handsomeness of some of the men I selected to be in the movie.

Since I am here to entertain you lovely ladies, I kinda feel like I should do what pleases the masses and display more pictures of handsome men. But no, my conscience will not let me do so. I will not post pictures of good-looking guys without due cause.

So I will not be posting any pictures of this guy:

Nor will I be posting pictures of this guy:

And I DEFINITELY will not be posting (more) pictures of this guy:

No, I will not drag this blog down into the gutter of man-lust! But we will talk about guys, or more specifically, about our first crushes. Do you remember back in your tween days? Back when you first realized that boys weren't stinky, gross, mean and stupid? Most likely, your first crush was the unobtainable celebrity crush. It was so much safer to set your sights on a guy you would never have to actually talk to, or even be in the same room with. My first celebrity crushes were:

Tom in Top Gun. I saw that movie SO many times. (Because of the fighter jets of course.)

Ricky Nelson, from watching "Ozzie and Harriet" reruns. I was devastated when I learned that he died just as I was entering my tween years.

And Kirk Cameron. I think I had that exact poster on my bedroom wall.

Like I said, the teen heartthrob guys were a much safer place for my awkward teenage affections. In real life, I was much too clumsy and airheadish to associate with any guy except those who were in the chess club.

Want to hear a painful real-life first crush story? Of course you do!

When I was twelve, I liked this one fellow so so so so so much (that would be a direct quote from my diary). Every other girl I knew liked this same fellow as well, including my sister. My odds weren't good. I was much too shy to talk to him, but I probably stared at him plenty from across the room in a stalker-esque sort of way. (Which by the way, is a great way to get noticed. Negative attention is better than no attention at all.) Well one time, we were playing volleyball at a youth activity and I got hit square in the face with the ball (I have snail reflexes; hiya!). It was painful, and I knew it was going to make my nose bleed, but I tried to laugh it off. Like it's so funny to have a volleyball SCRAB on your face. He came up to me, being ever so kind and compassionate, and said, "Oh my gosh, are you all right?" It was the first time he'd ever talked to me. And do you know what my response was? I whinnied. Just like a horse getting dragged to the glue factory. Seriously, I made this awful "neigh-ya-hahaha-waawaawaa" sound and then I ran away. I spent the rest of the night hiding in the bathroom, too ashamed to show my many shades of red (from the volleyball, from blushing, and then from crying) face. I think that was the only interaction I ever had with him. Thankfully we moved away a short time later. (My parents probably heard of this embarrassing fiasco and knew they must move quickly in order to salvage my reputation and enable me to become date-able material.)

So since I've shared TMI, will you please share as well? What posters of cute guys did you have on your walls? (Or do you still have on your walls if you are of that age or if you have a husband who doesn't mind you decorating your room with the faces of other men?) Also, tell me about your first REAL crush. Did it turn into anything? Did you embarrass yourself like I did? Do tell! And not to worry, your most private details are safe with us.

A Wordy Winner

It's December. I'm more scared about this month than I was October. (Sad, I know. I'm one of those procrastinators who ends up lost in the hecticness of the season.) Are you ready for it to be December?

And here's the bigger question: are you ready for me to use your words in this blog post? Brace yourself; this is gonna be good.

Devree, what the heck? Someone threw milk at you? What a motard. I want his name so I can come make his face all cursmudgled. Seriously. I'm driving down there yesterday to take care of this fudder, because Devree, even though I've never met you, you're duma.

And he could have used more uniquity, because I've heard of someone doing something similar. But it was even more lameasouras rex: someone threw ROTTEN milk. There was a gal who was not serendipitous and she chucked curdly, smelly milk at some man who had  dashed her hopes of connubial felicity. And the dude said "That girl's got a serious brattitude and I'm getting the www.heckawayfromher.com." At least I think he would have said something like that. But since I wasn't there to witness the event, it's possible that I'm being a gubula and passing along a tall tale. However, I do believe that it's real because every time I think about the coagulated milk, it makes me go idgida. I know it's lamesauce for me to be so squeamish, but I am just a kiddiepoop at heart. And can you imagine what that milk did to his skin? I bet it made him itchida like crazy. That milk tossing gal was one Bad Manzana. And Devree, I bet you wish that guy at your school was a touron, but I'm afraid you'll be stuck with him until the end of the year. Meow.

Bakerfam: Had you been watching Pride and Prejudice when your boys started saying "Darcy?" You must be related to Paulashawn because I think that she finds Ms. Austen most interestable. (And a flibbertigibbet Ms. Paula? You are not.)

There. I did it. Was that just splendiferous? Am I your favoritest author of all? Anne, was the letter "f" thing referring to my last name? The best of all "F's"?  I think that's what you meant.

Speaking of Anne: she is this week's prize sponsor. She's the talent behind Wall Graffiti. And since this was all about words this week, vinyl lettering makes the perfect prize. (Just in time for holiday crafting!) Make sure you check out her blog. And she'll have all her December lettering posted on the blog tomorrow. So all of ya head on over there and order a plaque that says, "F is for Folkman."

 

This week's winner is: (but wait, you're all winners for sharing your words with me) comment #3. Tara! Wahoo! You deserve a prize after all the words you wrote this month! Email me at folksinmt(at)gmail(dot)com and I'll hook you up with Anne. (Thank you Anne!)

And one more thing, Livingsonslifeinmt had technical difficulites and couldn't get her comment to post. But I'm sure she would have used the word "Schmooty Hooty." So I must say it as well. Without my clever friends, this would just be a blog. But with your help, you've turned this place into a real Schmooty Hooty. (That's a compliment!)

Oh, and another one more thing: some of those words are gonna be in Purgatory. You'll have to wait and see which ones. :)