Over spring break, we took a real quick trip to see grandma and grandpa (it was wonderful, like always). It made me think about the many road trips I have taken in my life. One thing about living in Montana: nothing is "close by." That means endless hours on the road. In a car. With a bunch of busy bodies. It sounds like the recipe for disaster, doesn't it?
But, as it turns out, less-than-perfect road trips are the ones that stick out from my childhood. My favorite road trip memory is from when I was seven or eight. We were on our way to Glacier in our Winnebago, but we never made it to our destination. Why? We hit a cow, that's why. A cow.
If only the highway would have posted this sign: we would have been spared the
agony of making ground beef with our Winnebago.
No one was hurt (other than the cow, but that's what he gets for trying to see if the grass is greener on the other side.) but the Winnebago did not fare so well. It was rebuilt and back on the road for our next mishap: the one where the holding tank backed up. But I'm not going to talk about that one because it is TMI and we don't do that around here.
Another memorable road trip (this time in a sedan) was one where someone had a case of the flu and did not warn the driver to pull over. But again, gross, so I'll skip the details and say that thankfully we were traveling by a river and were able to get cleaned up, although a sock floated away. Montana water might not be so pristine after all, huh?
As an adult, I had another mishap with an animal on the highway. This time I was taking THE boyfriend home to Montana to meet the family and he finally let me drive his beloved VW, with a ground clearance of about six inches. I turned a corner and there in the middle of the road was a deer. A dead deer, sprawled out across my lane. Using my keen reflexes, I kept the steering wheel straight and did not swerve into the other (unoccupied by either deer or car) lane and hit the dead deer like it was foot-and-a-half high speed bump. Going 65 MPH. Ka-thunk. Deer jerky anyone?
As a parent, I've had a few scary incidences. Like the time the car kept freezing up and refused to keep driving because it was 25 below zero. And then there was the time we got tired of following a snow plow (yes, that meant there was a big snow storm) and we decided to take a "short cut." We turned on the wrong dirt road and ended up deep in the forest, pushing snow with the front bumper of our minivan, not even knowing if we were on a real road, as there were no tracks in the snow. You know those stories of families getting lost in the mountains in the winter? That could have totally been us. We don't take that short-cut anymore--with the exception of the one time I thought it would be OK since it was summer, but I ended up getting a flat tire. No worries though, because I can totally change a tire while my five kids wait inside the car, right? No. It didn't go so well.
Wow, as I review my memories, I'm wondering if I might be a true redneck? Here's a picture from our last road-trip.
What do you think? Are we true rednecks?
And lastly but not leastly, I will never forget our family trip to Vegas (that sounds like an oxymoron) three years ago. That was the trip where we discovered that sweet little Bean Girl is diabetic. The number one symptom of diabetes? Frequent urination. It took us spending twenty hours in a car to realize just how often she had to go potty. (Pit stop. And drive for fifteen minutes. And pit stop. And drive for ten minutes. And pit stop ........) I'm sure she will never forget that trip either, nor will she forget the fun visit to the hospital when we got home. I will not mention why we went to Vegas since I'm already worried about the redneck image (cough NAS cough CAR. Ahem), but I will say that if you ever need someone to show you where all the good public restrooms are in Vegas, I'm your gal.
So what mishaps have you had on your road trips? Do you enjoy hitting the open road, or is it something you loathe? I actually love to go for drives, especially when the kids are sleeping or sedated with Dramamine. (Kidding, I have never done that before. Although it's tempting ...)
Let's hear all about your road trip adventures!
11 comments:
I've never had any really eventful road trips. All of my memories of road trips are of listening to Harry Potter or Tennis Shoes adventure series on our ventures to wherever we're going, getting there and continuing to drive around for half an hour just to find out what happens next or finding a good place to stop. I do get carsick, but mostly just nausea and a headache, cured by a window down and Dramamine. On my way to seminary once though, we almost hit a horse. And I almost hit a moose on my way out to the sand dunes once. I stopped on the icy roads with plenty of room but then my roommate decided she wanted to chase the moose.... I got her back in the truck before anything bad could happen, lucky for her. Another of the countless times I had to save her from herself ;)
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My family LOVES to go on road trips. We're on one right now! We"re in San Diego for Sping Break! Hmmmm most memorable....probably when bodily fluids were being exuded....I remember there being a horrible snowstorm and Mom was freaking out. Or when we were driving back from Florida and there was so much rain the windsheild wipers couldn't go fast enough and we had to sit and wait on the side f the road for the rain to let up. being from the desert that doesn't happen often. yep I think that covers them all.
My parents were insane and we took roadtrips all. the. time. 8 kids, 2 parents, and luggage for ten people all jammed into the Chevy Astro van. Let me just say frequent potty trips, car sickness, flat tires, fighting and screaming were enjoyed by all. I remember once when we were driving from MT to Ca. my dad thought it would be an awesome idea to strap garbage bags full of clothes to the roof. It did save a lot of room until the wind ripped the bags and they exploded all over a truckers windshield. Much to my dismay and horror, I soon found myself searching for lost underwear along the side of the highway. Oh what people must have thought. And that poor trucker. At least no one was hurt.
I don't love road trips, but I've come to see some of the perks. I have some really fun memories as a kid going on road trips as a family--6 kids and 2 parents in our Volkswagon Vanagon. Remember how seat belts weren't required when we were kids, so we got to just bounce around in all the seats and the floor and hang out the windows and help our parents feel so calm while driving? We used to pile all of our luggage in the back, and then pad the top with a flat cushion, and take turns 2 kids at a time relaxing in the back. "Is it my turn yet to be in the back?" was probably our favorite phrase.
Before our Vanagon, we had an awesome pickup truck with a huge camper. Dad had built some sort of structure for the bed of the truck, so we could store stuff in the side compartments, and also lay across the whole back (it's hard to describe, but it was a playground back there). Again, no seat belts required. At night, we just had to find the right place to park, and we could all 8 of us sleep back there, with the kids on the top, and Mom & Dad & probably baby on the bottom.
Our biggest mishaps included the time our Vanagon broke down during one trip. We had to take it to a fixit shop. The good thing is, we had made the trip WITH our matching family shirts--which had been made so that if we got lost at Disneyland, it would be really easy to find us, so they were florescent orange and white stripes. So while the van was getting fixed, 7 of us sat on the curb all in a line, in our matching shirts, and we waved to passersby. We had such a great time watching their reactions! I'm sure you're very familiar with the astonishment that comes when people learn that "ALL those kids" are in one family : ).
My other favorite mishap memory was when the sealing balloon thing that fits around the cab of the pickup truck (between the cab and the camper) popped, so there was nothing to keep the rain water from entering the cab. We had gone to McDonalds, and had received some Happy Meals that day that were not in the current cardboard box things, but rather in these sort of plastic train containers. So during the flash flood we were driving through, we were able to use our Happy Meals to collect rain water from all of the leaking spots in the cab and Mom would dump the water out the window over and over. I seem to remember we were laughing the whole time while we swam around in the cab : ).
No major mishaps since I've been a parent so far. I just hope my kids will enjoy our trips as much as I did back in the days before DVD players...I still to this day can sing almost all the lyrics to the Saturday's Warriors tape we played a million times and sang along to as a family : ). But those singalong experiences will be hard to beat : )!
The night trips are the best. You can sneek toward your destination without hearing,"How much longer?", or "Are we there yet?".
We traveled to Disneyland alot! But at least once a years we would make a trip to Wyo. Dummy me, I would leave at Sunset and try to pry my eyes open the rest of the trip by eating licorice, or keeping the windows down or closing one eye at a time. That was rough.
The only thing we ever hit while traveling was a Jack Rabbit or tumble weed. That is the desert for you. However, if you travel from Las Vegas, to Utah at Thanksgiving, we were sure to hit a White Out Blizzard. We didn't know how to drive in those conditions, much less have any indicating markers of a road.
I have traveled across the United States three times when we moved from Las Vegas to Florida and back West again. I tend to fall asleep as soon as I get in the car as a passenger and miss most of the scenery.
I really don't like traveling in the care so I try to fly whenever possible.
Nicole: we almost hit a moose once too! It's rear about went through the window of our minivan. Yikes! Let's hope your good luck on the road transfers to Steven in the skies.
Devree: I hope your bag of shame made it there in time for your trip. Not that I plan on you doing anything shameful: I just thought you might need it to, ya know, put stuff in. Safe travels this week: may your trip be precipitation free!
Rowley's: Such fond memories--cleaning up underwear from the side of the road. I hope no underwear ended up underneath the trucker's wiper blade, or that man would have some serious 'splainin' to do when he got home.
Jenna: Where does one buy orange and white stripped shirts for the entire family? Please do tell so I can get them for my next road trip. And I've never heard of anyone having to bale out the inside of a car before. Ha! That one's a classic.
Robin: oh, those nighttime drives. We've done that so many times. It's always great to arrive at your destination looking like your eyes are bleeding. I'm sorry you hit a tumbleweed. That must have been traumatic. :)
My mom was quite a seamstress in those days. She had bought an entire bolt of fabric at the fabric store, and MADE all 8 shirts for us. She and Dad picked it out because I think it was the loudest print they could find that would stand out in a crowd. At one point, littlest brother (about 3 years old) got separated from us while we were waiting in a long line at Disneyland, and someone down the line yelled "Hey, Dad, you lost one!" and they passed little brother back up to the rest of us. It was really funny!
I'm not as much of a seamstress as Mom was, but I do believe in family shirts for trips, so I bought us all the most amazing tie-dyed shirts for us to wear to Disneyland when hubby graduates. (I know, lots of people know how to make tie-dyed shirts, but it's certainly easier to buy them). I wanted tie-dyed because that symbolizes where we lived in Eugene, Oregon, the hippy capitol of the country, where hubby is earning his doctorate. The funny thing is, I didn't manage to buy them while we were there, but I found the PERFECT ones here in PA, so I splurged! I will have to show you a picture of our family when we all have them on : ).
Once again, I have nothing exciting to share. Road trips for Austin and I usually turned out bad (pre-children, now we just try to avoid them). Trying to cover too many miles after climbing, hiking, biking or kayaking all day without a solid plan of where the next stop was. Which always turned into a very hungry(low blood sugar=mean), sleep deprived wife. Very bad combination. He should have tried my parents drive all night while everyone else sleeps method. Doesn't produce many memories but it sure cuts down on the fighting.
I fondly remember the porta potty we had in the back of our truck. It was like a little kids potty (now that I think of it that was exactly what it was, but my mom called it the traveling potty, cuz what 8 year old in their right mind would use a toddler potty). Or the bottle my brothers used to tinkle in. Or, Aunt Dee's car next to us got the good candy bag from Macy's Grocery, so we just had a kid lean out from each car and switch candy bags as the drivers got as close to each other as they could driving 55mph. The Ables had a "no Stop" policy as you can tell. The best one was 2 years ago hubs, and the family went up on top of the mountain with our dog to go have a campfire and roast marshmallows. Our tire went flat,and a flat spare, and we were up on top with no cell service(What did we do before cellphones) Anywho, hubs found a guy on a 4 wheeler willing to take him down the mountain and to get our other car. Luckily we were only an hour from home. 5 hours later, he shows up to take us home. (NOt sure if he had dinner, or took a nap, or went grocery shopping, got a pedicure) I was not a happy wife trying to entertain 4 kids in the car, and to top it off, the stupid dog rolled in a dead deer carcass and smelled like Eau De Revolto!! We did have another trip too that I brought the stomach flu to a family reunion on our way to
"Windey road Yellowstone". I infected 4 cousins and Aunt Kay didn't have a sleeping bag to sleep in that night, because it was covered in an unmentionable substance that rhymes with Buke. There was another time too that had to do with a dog and loose bowels, but I'll end there. Awww, nothing like a vacation to clear your senses!
Road trips are sure different these days with dvd's and ipods. On all of our trips growing up we got to sing "Ol Humpy is Dead" or "How much is that doggy in the window" or "Bill Grogans Goat" and try to find the alphabet by looking at license plates. We got hypered out by by eating red licorice and picking through the Bridge Mix. (that took up about 15 minutes of the trip)
We took many trips to Disneyland so I remember those the most. Making my brother lay in the ditch of the sliding door of our mini van because the car was so packed or sticking him in the hatch of the mini van on top of the luggage. (What if that thing opened up...he'd end up on the LA freeway)
We took the aforementioned "Aunt Dees" cat on a road trip once. Jumped right out the window and never saw it again!
When I was 19 I took my first road trip about 120 miles to St. George. About 30 miles from a town I got a flat tire and had no spare (brilliant)...luckily about 5 minutes after I noticed that my spare was flat a guy i knew from work happend to be driving by and turned around and gave me a ride to the closest town to get my tire fixed. I had my tithing in the side pocket of my car and had to use that to pay the tire guy for the tire and was still short, so the guy who picked me up had to lend me money! ha ha. He had just asked me out for a date a week earlier and I turned him down! HA HA
As an adult we took the kids to....Disnelyand, (suprise) and on our way down it was HOT...but the car was having heating troubles so we unhooked the heater..no problem it was warm in california. On our way home though we hit a blizzard in Idaho and had NO heat. So we stopped at walmart and bought everyone a huge quilt and we had a little heater in front of the driver because the windows kept freezing up. So the driver got a 6" circle of clear window while the rest of us felt like we were in a freezing fog.
Good times, good times!
I did too warn the driver! And she told me she'd stop at the top of the hill. Sadly the top of the hill came after it was too late. And I think that's the last time I remember ever seeing mom drive with dad in the car (who received the greatest chunk of what I had to offer, although the air vents did get a share, as they reminded us every time we'd put them to use after that eventful trip).
I do love a road trip! I inherited wanderlust & I don't usually fight it. But it's really getting to be expensive!
I guess hitting the same bear 3 times takes the prize in road trip memories. Poor thing! And I'm sure we're not gonna forget this hotel we found ourselves in these next 3 nights, no matter how hard we try. It's not quite old enough to be on the National Historic Register, but the carpet seems really close. And it looks like they did a remodel to the bathroom sometime in the 80s. I might have to sleep in the car. Luckily the rest of our trip has been AWESOMESAUCE!!!
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